by Tim Barr
(San Diego, CA USA)
Hi, I'm about to buy your ebook because I need it. I've read about narcissists and agreed that I was in love with one a little while back. I've tried and faild to salvage our relationship but of course everything is my fault. I am excited to have been shown your site becaus it adds something new to the view of narcissism that I'v e not thought of before, and that is the fact that that they tend to shed all responsibility and blame others for their problems.
As I just screamed at him last night (he told me to scream and show my anger and not "push it down" and act indignant, and so I did. I told him that I'm aware that all of his fits of anger are always in attempt to shed responsibility, to avoid answering the question I just asked him or to take the focus off of himself. Then this big outburst that turns into a fight and we have a theatrical show where I am the center stage actor and we are now looking back at me and my obvious mistakes. This used to work I told him as I am always ready and able to look within for my shit and fix it. I'll take any blame I am given. (and that's the victim in me that he latched onto I guess) Trouble is I'm too smart to be victim. I see through it all eventually.
However, I am human and have not yet learned all the tools needed to manage this type of personality. This is why I cant wait to start reading this book! I'd love to be able to use them wheather I ever see my ex-boyfriend or on the next blamer that I meet, I'm sure that I will learn new tips to effectivly squash their power hungry blaming machine inside and hopefully create peace. I will have trouble perhaps letting go of trying to change them, but I can deal with learning that too.
The strangest thing about all of this is that while he was letting me know that I need to seek therapy because I create a situation and then blame him for it, he googled something and clicked on the first result and said "here read this, and this should show you what to do" How ironic that this site was all that I needed to truly help me better deal with him. He said he had not read the article he directed me to that it was random. But I question this a little because I know that deep down, he is an amazing man and knows himself well. I think that he himself understands his personality type and finally gave me some tools as to how to deal with him.
Is it possible that a narcissist could be as elevated and mature as I suggest? To know him self well enough as he claims to and to know that he stuck with that personality but to have the wisdom to point his boyfriend (me) to some tools to help us? That is if there is any US anylonger. He left officially for the 50th time to return to the streets where he can be left alone...
(and this is where my tears start and I stop writing)
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