I want to tell the truth

by Ladybug

I've commented on this site a few times encouraging others that honesty is the best policy, and now it's time for me to the my own advice. Back story: I was born after my mom had an affair. Her husband who was raising me as his own cheated on my mom later on, and their marriage sadly ended in divorce. I just reconnected with one of my dad-who-raised-me's daughters from a second marriage. We didn't grow up together, but I would visit my d-w-r-m and his new family from time to time. His daughter is about 10 years younger than me and now has a family of her own. Our dad passed away years ago, and we didn't stay in touch much. Before we really start building our relationship, I want to share the truth with her that I'm pretty sure her neither of her parents ever mentioned- that I'm not her biological sister. I don't want her to be mad at her mom/my step-mom, who I guess just wanted me to be considered as part of the family, which I can appreciate; but I also want our relationship, if we continue to build one, to be authentic and without secrets. This information has played a significant role in my personal development, and I'm telling myself that I can't control how she will feel about the withholding of it over her lifetime by her dad and mom. I am different in looks and talents than my siblings, and I bet even she feels it deep down, but this info. seems a little much to bring up over the phone. We live far away from each other. What do you all think? Ideas?

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Jan 08, 2018
Family is messy
by: Jodi Smith

I come from a your-mine-ours family of kids. 5 of my siblings are older than me.(13-7years older) and my sister is younger than me by 6 years. Yes, family is crazy, amazing, complicated and disgustingly messy. Here's how you are connected: you and your sister were raised by the same man. He basically adopted you and I think it's great and amazing your stepmom wanted to include you. Tell your sister what she means to you, then tell her about dad. He raised you as his own, even adopted kids have siblings. Sometimes family isn't blood related. Family is people who know you best and love you the most. Good Luck.

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