Putting Myself Down!/why do I always blame myself????????

by Sue
(Michigan)

If I had to make a list of the things I could feel good about myself for that list would be very slim. If I were to make a list of the bad things about myself I would have a list a mile long.........Sometimes I feel so inadequte and when ever anything goes wrong I know I have to be the one that has caused things to be that way. I put myself down all the time and just can never find any good about myself and just know that people don't really like me etc.
How can I over come all of these feelings and begin to feel good about myself. I am 57 yrs old, you would think I would have this mastered by now....... I feel like that saying "nobody likes me, everybody hates me, guess I will go eat worms!"
I have a loving husband and family I guess I just never learned to love myself. I am getting more and more over weight and I can't stand myself for that reason but continue to eat too much and exercise too little. Can you help me????????

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Putting Myself Down!/why do I always blame myself????????

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Mar 30, 2010
 Focus on Strengths
by: Anonymous

I am sorry to hear you feel very negative towards yourself. I think a great idea is to consider your positive qualities or abilities that you have. I bet there are some that you began to hit that downward spiral. It's hard to come back up once you feel beaten down and the worst is when it's our own self that does it. But remember those abilities you used to enjoy and focus on those. It may have been a long time since you tried them but gradually (little by little) try those out again. For instance, activities like: gardening, cooking, painting and other hobbies.

I would also recommend using a journal too. Write out all those negative thoughts as soon as you get up in the morning (when the mind is most active) and then let it go. Sit quietly and start to spend time loving yourself again. Trying to focus on positive and affirming sentences: "I am a good and worthy person, I deserve to be happy" "I love me for who I am NOW, and I will work to where I want to be" etc.

Good luck to you. I hope these suggestions help!

God Bless.

~Shawn E Styles~
Jun 09, 2010
 i feel down....
by: santiago

i dont know how to phrase my self here... btw i have quiting smoking last 6 month... i do great exercise.. because of my boss is my fren too.. he alway say bad thing to me.. every single day.. say im fat, i not good, all the bad thing is on me infront of other people.. since he is the boss, peaople say yes on that.. i so preasure with this situasion... i dont know last nite i bought marlboro light and start to smoke again... i eat a lot of junk food.. what i fight for last 6 month all are consider destroy.. i hate him... i hate him so much... i need to find other job, if i still with him i surely gonna die fast... i so stress with him.. his attitude so fuc**ng bad.... i so stress with him.. he think he good... actually he also some consider a bastard... only infront of certain people show him self so good... alway think he are so dam great... actually his not at all... because of my comitment i cant simply resign... i need to find some other job...
Oct 07, 2011
 I'm feeling the same way,
by: Kate

Hi Sue,

I'm Kate from Singapore and I'm 17 this year. Currently, I'm sharing the same feeling as you're. No, to be more precise, I've always felt this way since young but the situation worsened this year and I feel myself falling into despair with low self-worth. In an attempt to help myself, I've been reading books and seeking for help and realised that all we're worrying about may not even exist in the first place. We're merely "unaware" (physically aware but mentally ignorant) about the positive aspects which we possess. Thus, we tend to be in a negative and self-denial stage, all trapped and unable to get out. I've been making little changes to my everyday life, such as saying three positive things to myself nightly, and I felt better. Our "determination" and confidence that we're not good may actually prove that we do have a strong mind and we can make use of it in the right way. Don't worry, we can conquer this inner obstacle together because life is so great and so are you!

Yours Faithfully,
Kate (:
Nov 18, 2011
 Don't eat the worms!
by: Anonymous

I am the same age with the same attitude -- off and on! I know how to handle stress yet I get stressed! I know these feelings are just hormones and life affected and I know how to get rid of them -- but sometimes it takes longer than other times.
They say misery loves company... not really... but I felt a little better knowing someone else was like me and they are too reaching out to others just like I just did.
I bet you too have great things about yourself to be proud of and thankful for. Write them down even if you don't feel like it.
Look in the mirror and smile at yourself. Laugh out loud at yourself and believe it or not you will feel better. And you will have times when you feel like the song..."guess I'll eat worms." I know, because I sing the same song too -- off and on! Cheer up and smile! We are all going through the same thing. :-)
Oct 16, 2012
 Wow!
by: Anonymous

Big encouragement Kate! Needed to hear it.Rainn
Nov 18, 2012
 I always blame myself
by: CE

I am shy and i don't have to much friend when I am in front of people i feel really bad.Sometime when I am joking with someone and i say something and the person answer i feel like i do something wrong and star worry..sometime I don't know what to do ,I stay mostly at home , I am always alone.just go to work and comeback to sleep or staying on my computer...I don't really know what's my problem.I always blaming myself for everything,I always put myself down when i am talking to someone i mostly feel shaking...sometime I feel like i'am a stranger in this world and i get lost. right now I am crying cause I don't know what to do .only God know what I am going through..
Dec 02, 2012
 evrything I do is worrong.
by: Anonymous

Im very hard worker i work two full time jobs, and i dont understand evry thing i do is wrrong, I alwes do think for other people than for my self. when talk to someone i trye to be carful with my words and the tone of voies,evry body yelled at me for no reasen .please help me.
May 03, 2013
 To all who put themselves down.
by: Anonymous

Hi. I know how all of you feel, I fight myself everyday. Everyday. And this hurts, so much. I've dealt with this all my life, and yes with each slip up I unconciously tell myself such negative things. Alot of the time my self worth is shot, and to be honest sometimes I think the world would be so much better without me. Others have told me other wise, but it's hard to believe. And I cannot advise anyone because I still go through this, but just know that you are NOT ALONE. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. I continuesly have to tell myself that I am loved, I am beautiful, I am strong, I AM NOT ALONE. I just recently made positive pants. They are a pair of pants that have alot of positive words on it, like that I am smart, talented, funny, blessed, and loved. Anytime I think negatively, I must remind myself I lived; I'm alive, for a reason. I didn't die for a reason. I'm here because God chose me, before birth He saw me and said "This is my child, I will keep her. She is Loved by me." I have to remind myself that I survived at birth being 2 lbs. 3oz. Because He CHOSE me. If you go through something similar, then you are strong because you are alive. It takes an immense strength to go through this and come out saying "yes I hurt, but I have survived." He CHOSE you. Life is a gift, given to those who have the strength to bear it.
I am 18 years old, my name is Alantria, and I love you all. God Bless. :)

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