I just don't feel like I ever fit in
I am so sick of feeling like the odd person out ALL the time. Ever since I was little I just never felt like I fit in and always felt like the odd man/woman out. If there is a group of any kind; from bible study groups to 12 step groups I have attended to dinner parties at a friends house I always feel like the odd person out. I never feel like I belong or am included no matter how hard I try. It's so frustrating because I have been going to Al-Anon for 5 years now to deal with my AA husband and I STILL feel left out and out of place in the meetings. Some people that have said hi to me 5 years ago when I started don't even look at me when I come in the room. What did I do to them? Nothing! If I am sitting in a meeting in progress and someone comes in late if there is a chair right next to me or one across the room they will pick the chair across the room. I am a reasonably attractive woman (who showers regularly) and "think" I look approachable but could I really be giving off such a bad vibe than no one even wants to sit next to me? I try to say hi and include myself but it's so painful and frustrating to feel left out.